Leah VanHooseComment

Empty Pages

Leah VanHooseComment

Sitting here with this blank page in front of me. 

I have written 3 blog posts since I’ve been back from Florida only to have them lost to the ether. 

It is a crappy feeling to lose your words. 

To have them disappear in front of your eyes.  

To have your paper returned to you, unmarked, plain, empty.  

Now I feel, well, empty.  In Florida, every morning I woke up with words in my head, ready to spill onto the paper.  Now the emptiness is back.  Nothing to say.  I was once told that thyroid problems come from inability to speak your mind.  Holding the words in your throat.  Not letting the words spill out.  I wonder if it’s the same if the words never come, if they are stuck in the fog of my mind, not in my throat.  Whoever told me that was probably making that shit up anyway.  

Maybe the words are frozen like this state.  Chunked up like an icicle dripping down the roof.  Letting only one droplet release at a time.  One word at a time.  Hopefully as the thaw happens and the buds begin to burst onto trees the words will burst onto paper… 

Maybe. I can only hope.

 

 

Artist, dreamer, lover of life. Former gym owner redefining me.